It makes enough sense, I think I get it. A little. Either that or I am like completely off base but what I think I got sounds both fun and like, almost structurally-rebelliously (ie: against the game's actual desires) funny as hell.

Your not-hero sounds like a great protagonist! Like. from an "character who is interesting to read about" point of view, I don't think there's a better pitch I've ever heard to make me immediately check in