But I guess we're ~intelligentsiya~ so we don't count

"Old people hate technology, old people won't touch anything invented after the eighties", meanwhile my nonagenarian grandma thinks email is the best thing ever and is always on Skype and has recently discovered that she can just go turn on the internet and find ANY movie she wants to see and watch it immediately and now she's absolutely elated.

Ahhhhhhh!

I didn't dissociate, I just... happened to lose an entire hour of my time sitting here.

[incoherent brain screaming]

Hello I have managed to anxiety myself into a headache, I hope everyone else is having a better day than this!

Someone please put that company out of its (and my) misery

In 2014, the place I was working for got slapped with a huge list of things to fix by the federal government (and for good reason) and told to come up with a plan for approval.

The company came up with a plan. The EPA sent it back like "WTF, 90% of this is totally inadequate, and the remaining 10% is mostly inadequate".

The Chief Asshole Officer or whatever the fuck his title was called a meeting for the whole company. "Good news! The EPA thinks that our plan isn't TOTALLY inadequate! 10% of it was kinda-sorta not an utter failure!"

I keep thinking of this when I read news that's like "if you combine Biden, Klobuchar, and Buttigieg's polling numbers, they're more popular than Sanders OR Warren! Democrats want a moderate candidate!"

Eh

I cut my anxiety out with a spoon and turned it into a cake.

On second thought, making an orange-flavored cake blue was a confusing decision. But we don't have any red or orange food coloring left, so...